Derek Wayne Hughes
Bosshughes1, The Big Dog, Dad
Written by his son, Austin
If you want to know why my dad was such a staple in society, you first need to understand that it all began in the crawfish eating, domino slamming bayou called Louisiana.
The year was 1961 when he made his debut. The youngest of two sons born to Willie and Georgia Hughes. His mother had a big presence and was the greatest influencer of his life. She is the reason he became the protector, the problem solver, and the “ Mr. Put The Team On My Back”.
When he was very young, his family moved to San Francisco, and he and his brother were raised on the bay laced in fog and world class cuisine. Maybe this is why he loved food so much. He used to tell us about going to Chinatown to get pork dumplings. Not none of that Panda House nonsense.
He was raised knowing the importance of family, God, and making sure he got to the dinner table before his older brother, Joseph, ate all the food. Derek was able to keep his head down and stay laser focused, which earned him the title of Bosshughes and an acceptance letter into one of the most competitive electrical engineering schools in the country. As his favorite comedian, Bernie Mac, would say “America, what was he thinking?” knowing he would have to take all this calculus classes! He graduated in 1985 and went on to become an iconic, hard nose, African American leader in the fields of engineering and technical sales. This man climbed the ladder an environment where few African Americans had had access, and he made it look cool and easy like LL Cool J licking his lips. He had few weaknesses, no kryptonite – other than his favorite dessert, ice cream – with his lactose intolerant self.
However, before we get too nose deep in how my dad dominated the field in his career like the Detroit Pistons bad boys guarding the rim, we need to rewind the tape and travel to Wichita, Kansas where he met the love of his life. The person who cast a spell on him. The person who made him cheesy like a Keith Sweat concert. Lacie Watson-Hughes.
My parent’s relationship was natural. Like Babyface making hits. If my dad was the coffee, my mom was the sugar. Growing up, it was evident to my sister, Kendayll, and I that they shared the same values. Our home was always peaceful, calm and joyful. Their love was more iconic than Obama and Michelle’s. Their love was more iconic than Michael Jackson’s glove. It was a living definition of Black Love ( #relationshipgoals). It had 1 Corinthians 13 tattooed all over it.
My dad and mom had a very progressive, modern mindset for their time and had made the decision to grow their family by adopting, even before they were married. They chose adoption even though they knew they had other options because they knew Love was Love, and DNA would not determine or factor in on how they built their family. This all took place in the 90’s so let that soak in. This was before celebrity adoptions brought the act of adopting into every household. Way before the “ He was a rescue” narrative from suburban folks when talking about their dog.
My dad was such a proud and boisterous father to Kendayll and I. He made sure that even though we were raised in Ann Arbor, Michigan we knew how to pinch and suck the head off of a Louisiana crawfish! He supported any and everything his kids wanted to do rather it was Kendayll’s “I want to be a drummer like Sheila E, ”or my I want to be the next Wolf Blitzer or Don Lemon phase. Whenever Kendayll and I would get stressed, he would say “Take it one step at a time and don’t forget your last name is Hughes.”,
The “Big Dog”, as he liked to call himself, loved barbecue. He loved to eat it, grill it, smoke it, experiment with different sauces and dry rubs. When he would fire up his Weber grill, he would call up his brother, an uncle, or a friend and say “ Go outside, face North, and take in a deep breath so you can smell this meat I’m cooking.” My dad also loved sports and it was normal to find him “awake”, dozing in and out of sleep watching ESPN. He was a huge Star Wars fan. He had a love for Darth Vader, even though his heart didn’t match the color of Darth Vader’s helmet.
My dad always had his family’s back. He was so respected and his words never needed to be repeated or explained, because they had so much weight. His physical body is gone but his spirit is here with a bigger presence than his bellowing sneezes. His presence is everlasting and his memory will never fade.
If you ask a geometry teacher what the strongest shape is, they would say an equilateral triangle. But I beg to differ. The strongest shape is the heart. It is unbreakable and undeniable.
Thank you, Dad.
Memorial Contributions
Derek and I have always been committed to supporting the food banks in communities where we’ve lived. In lieu of flowers and gifts, please consider making a donation to your local food bank or volunteering to distribute food. Now, more than ever, our neighbors, brothers and sisters are suffering from food insecurity.
Natalie M.
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I am very sorry for your loss. I knew Derek for several years as one of Zuken’s customers. Working with him was a pleasure. He was very outgoing and a good conversationalist. Please accept my deepest and sincerest condolences! May God rest his soul in peace!
John Kapinos
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Hi Lacie, I’m one of Derek’s friends from Synopsys. You and I never met other than saying Hi when Derek had you on the speakerphone in his car. I just heard the news yesterday about Derek and I’m crushed. Derek and I stayed in touch after he left Synopsys. We would try to meet up at a BBQ place if we were both in Detroit or if he came to Chicago. We would talk every few months, usually about sports or commiserating about politics. I will miss him and our talks. My thoughts are with you, Kendall and Austin.
ELISA Balderas
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Lacie even though I cry for your loss, I know you will you lost the love of your life. I never met him, but your friends and family say it all. A person could live a lifetime in a relationship , locked in for a lifetime of heartache and pain. I am so happy to know God brought you the perfect ? mate to live the blessed life , that for many , will live and die , not knowing love in such a complete sense of the word. That is true love
Ken Johnson
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Sending my condolences to Lacie and the Watson-Hughes families. I met Derek at our mutual friend, Gerard Andrews world famous holiday parties. He introduced us as mutual friends and lovers of golf! Though neither of will amaze you with our prowess…other than the occasional shot that keeps you coming back…he and I met and played a round in the fall of 2018 if I am not mistaken. That was the last time we talked other than 3 weeks ago I texted him to see how he was doing and maybe going out again, that’s when I learned the family had moved to North Texas.
There was something special about Derek, he was unforgettable and genuinely tremendous human being. The tribute was absolutely amazing and to all that watched…listened can’t help to understand more about the man, the legend! There was no myth in Derek….
Rest in Peace Derek…I was proud to call you a friend.
Gerard Andrews
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Sending my condolences to the Lacie, Austin, Kendayll, and the family. Derek and I would meet periodically for lunch to catch up and talk shop. As two Louisiana guys navigating the world of high-tech, we shared a similar outlook on the the challenges and opportunities we both faced. Whatever we talked about that day whether it was sports, family, or business, the lunch would always end the same way. I would reach for my wallet and he would say, "G, you know I got this lunch man. I’m gonna expense it." As those who know whom will attest, he always had the biggest smile when he delivered that message. RIP, my friend.
Ron and Lafreeda Thomas
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I was so sorry to hear about the loss of my 1st cousin. We send our condolences to Lacey, Austin and Kendayll. Please know that he will be missed. Our prayers For the family will continue.
Paul Clemens
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Austin and Kendayll,
You may have been too young to remember your family vacation to the Outer Banks in North Carolina with our family. That was one of our best memories as a family, do you remember catching blue crabs using rancid chicken in the traps ( that was the best).
Your Dad left a significant impression on both of our children (Ashley, Austin).
After that trip, your dad got both kids big dog T-shirts and they wore them to bed often.
Fast forward to a college visit to Purdue University (Circa 2006) where Austin, Austin and Your Dad and myself spent the day visiting the campus. I wondered if that would have any influence on my Austin. Well it did and he graduated from Purdue’s school of Mechanical Engineering.
Additionally, after graduating with a bachelors from Ball State University, Ashley went on for another four years of college at Purdue to become a Veterinarian. Your Dad told me that Austin is a Vet Tech, that awesome!
Your Dad, has had so much impact on other peoples lives and I see that in my own children and for that we say Thank You!
Lastly, Your dad and I would stay in contact a couple times during the year. We would talk about your mom and her big heart for others, how very proud he was of Austin and Kendayll. At the end of each conversation we would laugh … man I’m gonna miss it His Laugh.
Lori and I are praying that all of you receive comfort and blessings during this difficult time.
Paul and Lori Clemens
(I will miss ‘running through life with Derek, the Big Dog)
Gladys Downing
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Let me start by saying…So Many fond memories! (Never forgotten)
In the beginning…there was just Lacie and I. Two single college grads, working for a major corporation in little old KANSAS.
At that time, we did not know we would become Life Long Best of Friends. As our friendship took form, we often found ourselves discussing our future and frequent the question "are there truly any real men still out there?" And my normal response would be, "probably not any real GOOD men." Well as usual, Mr. Derek Hughes proved me wrong! Lol
He wasn’t just a good man; he was one of the BEST. And he became a very special man (in my eyes), when he promised/vowed to love and cherish my girl friend LAC. He never wavered in his commitment to his wife or their children.
Lacie’s happiness was indeed one of his most important reasons for living. And because of his love for her, he made sure she
and I stayed connected and spent our special time together at least once a year; as we said we would once she moved away. I’m so grateful for that!
Lesson Learned–
I will no longer wonder or ask the question "are there truly any good men out there; instead my question will now be "are there any more good men out there like my brother ‘DEREK’? I Sure Hope So!
May God pour out an abundance of his LOVE upon all of you (Lacie, Kendayll, Austin and Family) during this most difficult time. I Love You Lac…
Carl Thomas
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"I was glad when they said unto me, Let us go into the house of the Lord". We have truly been blessed by the presence of the Lord in this memorial. May peace, blessings and joy comfort you Lacie, Austin, and Kendayll, in this difficult time. Knowing the memories will not fade, but get stronger through visions of dreams.
Greg Little
@
Lacie,
Kim and I send our deepest condolences to you, Austin and Kendayll. He was a man of great integrity, honesty, hard working, full of fun and wisdom. I will miss our talks about who could do the best BBQ, I am sorry we never got to throw down together! We talked about kids and marriage and I can tell you, he loved you all; deeply, fully and without compromise. He will leave a big whole in the hearts of everyone that knew him. Rest in peace Big Dog, you will be missed but never forgotten!
Aaron VanDyke
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Hello Lacie, Austin and Kendyall,
My name is Aaron VanDyke and I worked with Derek for several years at Delco Electronics, and then again at Mentor Graphics.
I remember your father most for his wisdom in dealing with people. He was a true leader, and had a certain way of mentoring without being overbearing. "Do you think you should send a thank you note since they drove all the way up from Indiana?," he would ask. Or "Do you think they’d like some coffee mugs?" To this day, I can still hear his voice as the "good angel" on my shoulder reminding me to do the right thing.
Well done Derek Wayne Hughes. You’ve made a wonderful life, and a wonderful family. God bless you, and God bless your family.
Aaron
Edward Duranty
@
Austin, Thank You for such a wonderful eulogy of your father! Derek and I worked together at Zuken USA, and I discovered a very special friend in Derek as well! I am very blessed to have known and spent time with him! He always talked of the love of his family, good food (especially BBQ), SEC football, and the events of the days. Derek would take me to some of his favorite BBQ places when we would travel together with work and we would talk about dry rub recipes as well as savor the food. I will always cherish our times together and the friendship. Thank you my friend…
Gladys Downing
@
Let me start by saying…So Many fond memories! (Never forgotten)
In the beginning…there was just Lacie and I. Two single college grads, working for a major corporation in little old KANSAS.
At that time, we did not know we would become Life Long Best of Friends. As our friendship took form, we often found ourselves discussing our future and frequent the question "are there truly any real men still out there?" And my normal response would be, "probably not any real GOOD men." Well as usual, Mr. Derek Hughes proved me wrong! Lol
He wasn’t just a good man; he was one of the BEST. And he became a very special man (in my eyes), when he promised/vailed to love and cherish my girl friend LAC. He never waived in his commitment to his wife or their children.
Lacie’s happiness was indeed one of his most important reasons for living. And because of his love for her, he made sure she
and I stayed connected and spent our special time together at least once a year; as we said we would once she moved away. I’m so grateful for that!
Lesson Learned– I will no longer wonder or ask the question "are there truly any good men out there; instead my question will not be "are there any more good men out there like my brother ‘DEREK’? I Sure Hope So!
May God pour out an abundance of his LOVE upon all of your (Lacie, Kendayll, Austin and Family). I Love You Lac…
Kendayll Hughes
@
Thank you all for loving my daddy ??
Saima Ahmad
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Beautiful eulogy by Austin. I also worked with Derek on his key accounts at Zuken. There is no doubt he was competitive but was also very considerate and kind. He gave his work his full potential and also making sure he was thinking of his family on his business trips. He was very professional but also personal. He will talk about his family and share his pictures; I had the pleasure to meet his wife at SKO/ZIW 2019. He will be missed dearly. He will always be remembered in my thoughts and prayers.
Brian Rolnick
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Though I haven’t worked with Derek directly lately, I remember when he first came to Zuken. He was quite and listened and watch what was going on. Reading the lovely Eulogy written by his son, Austin, fits with everything I remember about Derek. Always there, steady and a great sales man. I feel blessed to have known him.
Susan Bruner
@
Austin Kendyall Lacie ,
We are so GREATFUL to have you guys in our lives.
My Austin, Cara and I know that Derek was always there for his family.
We want to thank you and Derek for always being so welcoming and accepting us in your home filled with love peace and joyous laughter. Yes and wonderful food.
Chris Beck
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I loved Austin’s Eulogy, it gave me greater insight into the man who had a good influence in my life. I worked for Derek on one of his key accounts with Zuken and we were both a challenge to each other at times I am certain. He was generous gift giver, thoughtful, kind and friendly. His demeanor was always calm, professional, and respectful. His love of his family was always evident, especially when he was on the road and looking for gifts to send or bring home. He helped me professionally and personally to be a better man. I am grateful to have known him.
Whitney Omole
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Beautifully written eulogy, Austin. This post was a memorial and an imaginative flashback story enabling us to all have a much needed smile amidst these times.
Robert Watson
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Tribute to “Brother Man” Derek Wayne Hughes
“Family isn’t always blood. It is the people in your life who want you in theirs, the ones who accept you for who you are, represent and stand for without being judged. The ones who would do anything to see you endure, laugh, smile and succeed & who LOVE YOU no matter what.”
This is only an exceedingly small tidbit of what Derek represented. We all can go on and on for what he meant to any of us and still be unable to capture his entire life as he proudly lived and as we all now cherish but let me express as what I proclaim to be fact. Derek will always be remembered as a committed/loving husband to my Baby Sis Lacie for over 30 years, proud and supportive father to my nephew Austin & niece Kendayll of which he exhibited endless love towards. In addition, love for his brother Joe and a slew of other family members and friends. Was quite competitive in all aspects of life, successful at being professionally driven and highly respected by his peers and other business associates. Loved to eat and was “self-proclaimed” BBQ expert such as I proclaim to be as well. But what I will most remember him as is being a true man of integrity, someone that could be trusted without any semblance of having to question any of his actions and someone that I had the highest respect for.
“It is not common for mankind to deal with the loss of love ones because our minds are conditioned to deal primarily with living life. What we can do is celebrate/cherish the times that we had and hopefully make those memories everlasting.” YOU WILL BE TRULY MISSED & NEVER BE FORGOTTEN!
Alvin
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Life is a precious, but fleeing commodity that is only loaned to us for a short period of time! It’s what we choose to do with that precious commodity that gives it value. Thank you Derek for teaching me the true meaning of life… "It’s been an honor and privilege to have known you and call you a true friend!" RIP!
Toni Watson
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One of the hardest tasks a person may have to do in their lifetime is to write a heartfelt condolence to the family regarding the loss of a love one, especially if that person is family. I’m going to send off my brother-in-law, Derek (brother man) Hughes with a funny but heartfelt story.
When Lacie and Derek were a young couple living in Michigan, Austin wasn’t even born yet the only child living in that apartment was a black lab named Smokie. This particular summer, I came up for a visit and spent a warm, summer week enjoying the city of Ann Arbor and the local beautiful parks. The whole time I was there Derek kept trying to engage me in some sort of sport competition. Anybody who knows Derek can attest his drive to compete and win. First it was a game of badminton and I lost bad. Next Derek decided that all three of us would ride bikes and I barely kept up for Derek was pretty skilled as an amateur cyclist. Finally, we’re taking a long walk through a park when we came across a steep hill, at which Derek wanted to challenge me this time to a foot race to see who would reach the top of the hill first. Initially, Lacie said “don’t do it Toni.” But I wanted to take Derek on, and I accepted the challenge.
Lacie was the official referee and would call it like it is, get on your Mark, Get Set, GO!! We took off running and both of us was necked to neck until finally I broke free and passed Derek and beat him up the hill, not only did I beat Derek but so did Smokie who was right behind me and came in second. Derek never talked about the day again, that’s how competitive he was.
Derek was also a good man with a big heart; he loved and cherished his wife of over 31 years of marriage, and his children was the joy and pride of his life. I will miss all the love and support he gave to this family. God Speed my brother.
Shannon Cohen
@
Lacie, Austin and Kendayll,
Please know that you are in our prayers during this difficult time. If you need anything please let me know.
Love your cousins,
Shannon,Leon and Lyncoln Cohen
Michael McGlon
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Beautifully and colorful. Thank you for sharing
Jennifer Isom
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Sending our condolences, love and virtual hugs to all of you. Derek will be missed greatly…
Your cousins,
Jennifer, Darin, Chloe & Caleb Isom
Jennifer T
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Beautiful message. Yes. The strongest shape is the heart.